MOTHERS’ DAY MESSAGE - The Role of a Mother in building a Family

  

Nowadays, many women are career oriented and ambitious. Great! But remember this – The greatest achievement for every mother would be “to bring up her children in the fear of the Lord and make them responsible citizens.”

Let me share a few responsibilities of a mother:

1. First of all – Who is a mother?

a) The first threshold for the children:

When a child is born, he/she has no idea about the outside world. He/she is alien to human society. Mother is the only person they know; the first connection. That’s why, from the moment a child is born, he/her life on earth is greatly influenced by the mother. From her they will derive character, mannerisms, religion, culture, likes and dislikes etc. Maybe they will change some of them as they grow older but most of them will remain because it is very difficult to change the things which are learnt and acquired during childhood.  

b) A role model:

Mother is the most important person for the children. Hence they like her so much and tend to follow her ways. They love to imitate and follow on her footstep. That’s why it is said that “A mother is worthier than a 100 teachers.” It is said that children tend to follow their mother unconsciously even though she is wrong. Hence, every mother should aspire to be a good role model. Set good examples.

2. Characteristics of a good mother:

It is true that a good mother posses some rare qualities which is not found in others.

I want to mention 3:

a) Love:

A mothers’ love is incomparable. She does not differentiate whether her child is old/young, normal/abnormal, obedient/naughty. She loves them equally. Even though she scolds sometimes when disobeyed, her love is constant. The love of a mother is the spring of happiness and peace in a family. Mother is the bond that connects all the members in the family. 

b) Committed:

The sacrifice and commitment of a mother towards her children is immeasurable. In order to make the children good, she sacrifices her time, energy, pleasure and even sleep. She is selfless and always puts the need of her children first. This is a very important point to be noted in today’s world because many mothers put their career above the family these days. Hence, many families break up. Therefore, mothers should not be hesitant to invest her time in the family. You should consider as a future investment.

c) Responsible:

A good mother is always concerned for her children. She prays for them at all times. She doesn’t want anyone of them to fail in life. She always thinks about their welfare and is full of advice. Her heart is always with them. Even though others forsake, she always feels and take care of her children. This is why most of the time children share their problems with the mothers.

3.  Three things a mother should know:

a) Know her role in the family:

Motherhood is not an easy job. The responsibility is immense. One should not take it lightly. One should take it as a great opportunity as well as the biggest mission given by God. Therefore, whoever has been called to be a mother, or rather blessed to be a mother, you should give your best in bringing up your children.

b) Have vision:

Desiring good children is not enough. Everybody wants their children to become successful in life but many do not know how to teach or show the way. Therefore, every mother should pray and seek for God’s help. Ask him to reveal his purpose for each child. If we fervently pray, surely he will show the way. She must also share her desires and intentions with the children.

c) Know the potential of each child:

Children are different. They have different qualities and talent. As such, their likings and ambitions vary. Hence, a good mother never compares a child to another child. Instead, she finds out the strong points of every one and motivates them accordingly.

Lastly, one last word – No matter what we say, the strength of a mother is based on ‘LOVE.’ Whoever does not have love, she cannot be a good mother. In the bible we see many examples of good mother. And the common quality in all of them is ‘love.’ It is this love which strengthens and motivates her to do more for the sake of her family. It is this genuine love that makes her endure pain, shame and overcome obstacles. That’s why, as written in the Proverbs 31: 28, “her children arise and calls her blessed.”

How to get Pregnant - Pregnancy Tips

Well, well, I am not going to offer medical advice. Just want to share some few tips out of experience hoping that this would benefit some couples.

To begin with, most of us thought that getting pregnant would be easy especially when we were young. Honestly never in my life have I imagined that I would ever encounter this thought – Am I destined to become a father?

What are the obstacles that can prevent you from becoming a parent? Infertility, age, miscarriage, ignorance, carelessness etc. etc. ????

Let the doctors explain on the first two points. But for the last three, I have something helpful to share and I believe and hope that this will prove beneficial for some couple.

You know, my wife and I went through some painful period as we had two miscarriages. You know what I mean. However, I blame myself (even my wife) for that. Of course, being a Christian, I believe that it’s entirely in God’s hand whether to have children of our own or not. But let us also not forget that ‘God help those who help themselves.’ You know many of our failures in life are caused by ‘ignorance’ or ‘carelessness.’ Ours was both. It was found that the miscarriage was mainly caused due to – Firstly, driving (she drove from home to college daily – 25 Kms – and my in Kohima road. Kohima is dubbed as the pothole capital of the world). Secondly, lack of planning. Thirdly, eating forbidden foods. There are certain foods to be avoided during pregnancy. Fourthly, lifting heavy stuffs and doing things that demand too much abdominal movement.  

So here’s what I want to share:

1.  Don’t drive – If your work place is too far, better get an apartment near it for the time being. You can hire a chauffeur. Also see that whenever you travel, avoid jerking and bad roads. For us, we rented a house near her college. We planned only after getting into the new house.

2. Plan – We do things better when we plan. Better the plan, better the outcome. Even getting pregnant demands planning. You know there are fertile period for women. So you plan accordingly. Know her menstrual cycle and mark it on the calendar. There are some websites with ovulation calendar. Here’s one BabyHopes.com. See that you (husband) abstain from any sex activities (no ejaculation) for at least 4-5 days before the planned date (mating).

3. Bed Rest – It is said that the first trimester (first 3 months) is very crucial. So take enough rest (especially) bed rest.

4. No heavy work – If you are serious to become a mother, leave the work for now. There will be work until we die. Don’t tire yourself too much or lift heavy stuff.

5. Know what you eat – There are certain fruits which cause abortion. So research and avoid those foods. You can google and find out. Here’s a good website Huggies.com

6. Take nutritious foods and vitamins – Just as some foods are bad, there are some great fruits/vegetables that are good during pregnancy which makes the womb strong. Research and take those.  Babycenter.com

         If you follow these, from human point of view, you will become a parent. Also pray fervently. Everything is from above. The Bible says "Ask and it shall be given unto you." (Matthew 7: 7) God listens and hears our prayer. Sometimes He tests by giving us challenges so that we grow in faith. As for me and my wife, you don't know how much we prayed and spent time with Him. Do what you can and leave the rest to God. Amen!

The Strength of a Mother

How do you even begin to describe the strength of a mother? There are so many words and ways to describe a mother especially our own mother yet if we try to fathom the various qualities of a mother, pages would not be enough and even a lifetime will not be time enough. So where do we start? How can we describe ‘her’ best? Today, I want to pay my tribute to all mothers and my mother especially by trying to delineate a mother’s very essence in the simplest way and according to my own perceptions.

I truly believe that the one word which would describe a mother and her strength is ‘LOVE’. It is here that she receives and emanates all her incredible strength. It is this ‘love’ that makes her a compassionate and a selfless person. A cliché I cannot resist but use is that she is a ‘reflection of God’s love for us’. Unconditionally she gives everything to her children. Her strength is not measured in terms of sinewy muscles or biceps etc but her strength lies in the gentleness and quietness of character, her faith and trust in the Lord, her ability to be a great teacher and a spiritual guide, her endurance, her ability to forgive……she does not feel ashamed or afraid to seek help for her family and wants only the best for her children. All these qualities are encompassed in her ‘LOVE’.

Many great mothers and their diverse individuality are portrayed at length throughout the Bible. Mary, the mother of Jesus, a great woman of faith, raised her son to fulfill his calling. Hannah, trusted God and the Lord heard her prayer and blessed her with a son, who she gave over to the Lord as she promised. Since Hannah was faithful and a wonderful mother, we learn that God blessed her with even more children. Then 2 Kings 4:1 tells us about a certain woman whose husband had died and was in debt. She had nothing to offer but her sons for slavery and no mother would want their children to be slaves. So she swallowed her pride and cried out to Elisha for help and by the power of God, Elisha was able to help the destitute woman. The mother of James and John wanted the best for her sons. She wanted Jesus to give her sons a seat next to him in his Kingdom. Moses’ mother shows us that the determination and ingenuity of a desperate mother can result in surprising result. Moses knew about his people and about God. He had definitely learned it from his mother, and her teachings stuck with him throughout his life.  All these mothers had one thing similar `LOVE’ and it was the immense love for their children that made them what they are.

My mother may just be one among the many mothers in the world, but she is the only woman who is and can be ‘my mother’. I cannot help but describe her because it is through her that I have learnt and seen the special qualities that God has given the mothers. She is a simple retired clerk enjoying her pensioned life, satisfied to be at home, taking care of the house, making sure the house is a home, full of love and warmth, when her children and grandchildren come to her. She is someone who has no regrets sacrificing her career by refusing promotions many times because it meant being transferred to another place away from her family. As a child, I remember her trying to stretch the salary to meet the monthly expenses of a large family. Despite her hectic schedule, she would always have the time to help me with my bible memory recitations. She is never too busy to help any of us. She would rather look into our needs than hers. She would swallow her pride so that her family would not suffer. I have seen her enduring many situations, hardships and experiences of life with such calm faith in God that I, now as a matured woman, can only look at her with amazement. She has journeyed with all of us in our bumpy life’s journey. All along, she has cried happy tears and sad tears too. She feels our pain and carries our burdens. She is our greatest ally. And most of all her love for us can only be compared to the love of our heavenly father. To know that she is praying for us at all times is a comfort that envelopes us wherever we go. My mother has taught us to fear, love and serve God at all times, to forgive, to be patient, to be truthful, to be kind and compassionate. She is the best living example for us when it comes to learning the valuable lessons of sharing and generosity. Her greatest advice is to always know and serve God in whatever capacity and to trust Him no matter what the circumstances.

I may have appeared to be praising my mother and painting a picture of a person larger than life by listing only the good qualities. Of course! She does have her flaws and limitations and that makes her more human and normal like any other, a real person. When I was younger, in all my ignorance, I would, most of the time, see only the defects, but now I have realized that though she is not perfect, she wanted to make us perfect human beings worthy in the sight of God. And the superhuman strength that she seems to possess comes from her ‘LOVE’ for us.

This, ‘LOVE’, then is the core of a mother’s strength. Her love drives her, strengthens her, motivates her, sustains her and moves the world. The world may describe a woman to be frail, delicate, fragile, helpless, defenseless, slight, insubstantial, weaker sex etc. but these qualities do give a unique beauty and exquisiteness to a woman. Without all these she cannot be a ` woman’ and yet underneath all this façade of vulnerability is a reservoir of incredible strength that oozes and radiates through her love. It is this special unique package `mother’ that we all love and admire for everything that she is. May God bless all mothers!

Written by Ajungla Jamir